Thursday, November 27, 2008

The Return Of Goofy Gobbles

Goofy Gobbles wants to wish you a very Happy Thanksgiving!
... and if you don't celebrate Thanksgiving, then Happy Thursday!

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Aging is Not the Devil

I know I harp on this a lot... but enough already!

Is anyone else tired of seeing/reading articles like this one: "Can You Believe She's 50?" on

To some degree, the 15 women who are highlighted take good care of themselves and have good genes. To a higher degree, however, most of them are extremely wealthy, can afford personal trainers and chefs, and... of course... botox and plastic surgery.

You know those asterisks that are placed next to world records or undefeated seasons in sports where there are some extenuating circumstances? Yeah. I want an asterisk next to the names of those women who botox their foreheads as tight as those on 6 year old children.

Am I jealous of them? No. I could afford botox if I wanted, and. I. Do. Not. Want.

Yes, I will complain about my saggy jaw, droopy eyelids, and gravity's effects on my aging body. BUT, I am almost 40 years old. I have earned every single wrinkle I have, and I want to show the world what it's like to really live. That doesn't include injecting past-its-expiration-date-mayonnaise into my skin.

My biggest concern is the statement this type of attention on 'maintaining youth' sends to our young women. We don't need a world full of Jocelyn Wildensteins in the next 50 years.

No thanks. I'll pass. I hope my daughters have a positive sense of self and can say the same thing.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Confessions of a Lip Product Addict

Hello, my name is Grumpy F., and I am addicted to lip products.

Lip gloss.
Lip balm.
Lip stain.
Lip shine.

I can't resist. In fact, this morning, I looked in my purse. Here's what I found:

1. Stila Long Wear Lip Color in coquette.
2. Stila Long Wear Lip Color in rendezvous.
3. Victoria's Secret Smooth Talk Creamy Lip Color Palette (5 shades).
4. Smashbox O-Gloss.
5. Smashbox Lip Brilliance- Transparencies (3 shades).
6. Revlon Color Stay in Fabulous Fig.
7. Bare Escentuals Buxom Lips in Roxy.
8. Revlon ColorStay Mineral Lipglaze in Forever Raisin.
9. Victoria's Secret Beauty Rush lip gloss in Cherry Bomb.
10. Delux Beauty Kiss It! lip gloss palette (6 shades).


But wait... are you getting this? Those are just the ones I had in my purse. That doesn't even account for all the others in my makeup drawer and in other purses:

1. Bare Escentuals Buxom Lips Full Color in 2 additional shades.
2. Revlon Color Stay in 2 additional shades.
3. Revlon ColorStay Mineral Lipglaze in 2 additional shades.
4. Stila Lip Glaze in 2 shades.
5. Clinique Long Last Long Shine Lipstick in at least 3 shades.
6. several lip balms, including Burt's Bees Shimmers in 3 shades.
7. a couple of lip stains.

I have a sickness.

If I stopped buying new lip products for the next 3 years, I still wouldn't run out (except that the ones I have would be 'old and gross;' and therefore, I would need to buy more).

I don't know what's wrong with me. I need to use what I have before I buy anymore.

Perhaps, a good idea would be to carry a palette of shades with me that I already own. That way, when I see a new product, I won't be as tempted to buy it.

Yeah. Right. Let's go with that.

BTW, thanks for the supportive comments for the previous post. You're the greatest!

[photo credit] Anyaka. "kiss_lips." Anyaka's photostream. 13 Feb 2006. 13 Nov 2008.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

This Is Not A Crisis

I don't think I'm having a mid-life crisis. Really, I don't think I am. I'm fairly certain it's just a mid-life slump. That's all.

Overall, I'm very happy with my life. I love my family. We're busy as hell, but I wouldn't trade my time with them for anything in the world. There's so much enjoyment in watching our kids in their activities... even though that means we're traveling all over the state (and sometimes, outside the state) to watch the kids do what they do. That doesn't seem like an obligation to me. It's time with my husband and kids when I really feel fulfilled.

On the other hand, I think my professional life is weighing me down. I like the idea of my job... I love the field of study and how I'm able to help people... but I'm not happy with the schedule, the extra time I spend at work that takes me away from my family, and the sheer mental exhaustion of it all.

My house is a disaster, because... when I am actually home... I'm too tired to deal with it. My personal fitness plan is non-existent (see previous point). I pay bills online over my lunch hour, when I actually have a lunch hour, and other personal errands happen when they happen.

I think you get the point. I'M TOO BUSY.

What I REALLY want to do is...

1) write- books, articles, blog (more)
2) get back into painting again
3) go on photography retreats
4) travel occasionally and facilitate workshops and deliver presentations in my field (this would require me to become self-employed)
5) sing with a group again and be the musician I am, rather than the one I "dust off" occasionally
6) stop stressing out over everything all the time!!!

That's not really all that much to ask, is it?

Ah... but then there's that money issue. Our youngest is a sophomore in high school. Our oldest is a sophomore in college. And the two in the middle are also in high school-- one junior, one senior.

KIDS ARE EXPENSIVE. So is college.

So... those things I really WANT to do are not in the business of paying me what I require to afford the college thing. And the high school thing.

Therein lies my dilemma.

Can I be patient enough to wait until the youngest is out of college? That's about 7 years away. Can my health and mental wellness sustain 7 more years of what I'm doing now?

I don't know. I honestly don't know.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Grumpy Helpful Hints- The Bling Edition

If your jewelry armoire is overflowing, stop buying friggin' jewelry already! And stop having parties where people sell jewelry. And stop going to parties for people who booked a party at your party where people sell jewelry. Enough already.

This hint is brought to you by husbands who are tired of all your jewelry, as well as the parties where they have to get lost for a few hours.

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Grumpy Helpful Hints- Special Edition

This is a double edition... aren't you lucky!?!?

1. If you A) are already somewhat of a nervous flibbertygibbet, and B) believe in ghosties, never hang a dark sweater in the back of your car and then drive with the windows open. This will cause you to catch the swinging dark sweater out of the corner of your eye in the rearview mirror. It will also cause your heart to stop ever so slightly while you freak out as you are driving.

2. If you are excited about the candidates for whom you are voting today (or perhaps for whom you have already voted), it is just fine and dandy to exhibit exuberance about said candidates. It is not, however, fine and dandy to mock or shame people who are voting against your candidates' opponents. Remember... it's okay to agree to disagree.

That is all.

These hints are brought to you today by sweaters, ghosts, democracy, and "can't we all just get along?"