Wednesday, September 02, 2009

I Can See The Future

(wine is wearing off, and I have a real post!!!)

Hi. My name is Grumpy F., and I am a hoarder.

Have you watched Hoarders yet on A&E??? That is some crazy stuff. Some crazier than others. Some bat-shit crazier than others.

When I watch that show, my stomach hurts. BADLY. Why? Because I think I am one of them.

No, not that lady with all the rotting pumpkins and squash on her floor. I'm not anywhere NEAR that bad. But the one with boxes and bags full of stuff that she needs to "go through," but can't find the time to do it? That is me. Since she is probably 20-25 years older than I am, just imagine her house with 20-25 years less junk. Definitely me.

The Farm Boy watches that show with me. When he's being kind, he tells me I'm not as bad as some of those people. When he's being truthful, he looks at me and says, "That's you, babe." When he's being an arse, he laughs and points at me. (ok, not really)

For me, it comes down to three things:
1) I attach emotions to objects. We used to call ourselves "pack rats," as if that was a good thing. I hate rodents! But objects hold memories for me. I'm thinking maybe I just take a digital pic of those types of items, and then toss them. It might work.

2) I was taught not to waste things, and you always need empty boxes, right? And extra bags. And that last drop of perfume still in the bottle, even though you already have a new bottle. And that makeup you bought that doesn't really look good on you, but you bought it so you should use it (even though you never will) Ugh. It's a sickness.

3) I'm afraid I will need something I've just thrown away. I can't throw away the box for the blender (TV, computer, hair dryer, camera, etc.)... when we move, it will be so much easier to pack "it" in the original box. PLUS! The instructions might still be on/in the box! See? It's PRACTICAL.

Nope. It's not practical, and deep down, I know it's not. (oh, and we have no plans to move within the next 4 years or so, either)

For a lot of the people featured on this show, there are deep emotional/psychological issues. For many, organization is also a challenge. I don't know where I fit in this... I think I'm not organizationally challenged, because I know where everything is. (I know. I KNOW. WRONG.) Hopefully, the emotional/psych issues aren't too deep. I mean, recognizing that I have this problem is more than half the battle, right? I truly believe this was a learned behavior. My mother is the same way, and her mother was, too.

So, the good news is that, after watching this show, I really do feel the need to purge. (not my stomach-- the contents of our storage room, stuff lying around the house, in our room) I want to do it for myself, but I also want to do it for my family.

Now I just need to find make the time.


J and J Acres said...

I've never seen that show, but I hope I catch it one day.

I used to be worse than I am now about keeping stuff. Like you, I was afraid that I'd 'need it' and I didn't want to waste things. I think what cured me of that was when we moved into this house a couple years ago... My small apartment had SO MUCH crud in it that I've been trying to prevent that from happening at our current house.

It's still hard, but I feel so much better when things are neat and organized!!

3carnations said...

I feel like I prompted this post by sending you a message, so I will enjoy the day with an inflated sense of self-worth. :-)

I am the same way about holding onto things. I am getting better about it, but like you, time is what's holding me back now.

Stinkypaw said...

It's a choice we make, that much I know. I still have (too) many things I attached sentiments to, but I try to remind myself the memories are in me and I can let go of the "goods". One thing that does help me, when I go through a purge is giving away to people I know needing it - I like to find "good homes" for them...

P.S. Welcome back.

Poppy said...

I am scared that if I start watching that show I will become a hoarder, hehehe.

don't call me MA'AM said...

@jen it's totally worth it. Record it... you won't be sorry.

@3car yep, that's what prompted me. ;-)

@stinkypaw thank you! Oh, and I need to just have a big garage sale or something... things I hold to "give" to good homes end up staying in boxes in my basement anyway.

@Poppy is that like deciding to be more promiscuous from taking a sex ed class? haha

Ludicrousity said...

Haha! I'm so not a hoarder!

lizgwiz said...

I don't get sick, exactly, when I watch the show, but I do find myself each time resolving NOT to give in to my packrat tendencies any more than I already do. Which is...quite a bit, actually. Except that my packrat tendencies have to do battle with my neat freak tendencies, and sort of keep each other in check.

Anonymous said...

Ugg boots