Hey, every now and then (or more often than not), I have to live up to my blog name. Okay? Yeah, that's what I thought.
Anger-inducing Peeve #1: Waiting for FIVE MINUTES in a left-turn lane with a red turn light when there is no oncoming traffic. It's not a dangerous road- you could see any approaching vehicles from about half a mile away. There is absolutely NO purpose for that light to stay red, other than during heavy traffic times. Five minutes, people. Do you know what I could be doing with five extra minutes in my day? Yeah. That's what I thought.
Anger-inducing Peeve #2: Watching Ryan Seacrest pause before he's supposed to announce who's going home on American Idol, and knowing he's going to say "... right after this commercial break." Really. We know you need your ad time. Why don't you just cut through the crap and tell us what we want to know early on in the show, say the first 15 minutes. Then you can play all the ads you want. Sure, we'll be gone. But we won't be driving a nail through our palms each time you say, "... right after this commercial break." Listen to me, Seacrest. Nigel Lythgoe, you too. This is not suspense. It's just pissing us off. I flip the channel to watch something else until the last 4 minutes of your show now. So, what now? Yeah, that's what I thought.
(counter to anger-inducing peeve... America finally got it right! Kellie Pickler, it was nice knowing you! Not really, but I'm just saying.)
Anger-inducing Peeve #3: My bathroom scale is a big, fat, stupid head LIAR! I hate it. It sits there, all smug, on the tile of my bathroom floor... just daring me to have hope. I'm working out everyday. Two days a week, I'm with a physical therapist for an hour. Did you hear that?!?! An HOUR!!! Sure, it's not terribly intense, but it's still more movement than my crazy, broken body saw 6 months ago. I'm eating so well (even let up a little on the Chipotle addiction). People who eat around me feel ashamed for all the greasy nastiness they are consuming. I'm eating my 1200 or less calories a day of fruits, veggies, lean protein, blah, blah, blah. But I'm digressing somewhat...
Back to that arsehole scale of mine: it's evil. Just when I feel like, "Hey! I bet I've lost at least a pound or two! Scale-y loves me. I'll just ease my toes ever so slightly onto it's cute, white surface, and..." BAM! No loss. Not one stinking pound. As I stand there and watch the digital numbers move back and forth... then finally rest on the higher number (of course)... I hear the scale huffing and puffing like it's out of breath. I step off, defeated... and then it laughs at me. Oh, yes it does. No, really. It does. Don't argue with me, or I'll punch you. Yeah, that's what I thought.
Anger-inducing Peeve #4: The month of April. Wha? Yes, I said the month of April. It seems all nice and shiny... spring is here, tra la! Au contraire, mon frere... not in the midwest. It is the month of UPS and DOWNS.
April crept in and gave us this lovely, temperate weather, and we all sighed... contentedly. Then... it got hot. Like Africa hot (okay, maybe not THAT hot, but I just like saying that). Like 90 degrees F hot. Hmmm... turn on the AC in April? Okay. I'll bite. A day or two of that, then it hovered around the 70-80 degree F range. That's fine. AC keeps things nice and shuts off when not needed. No prob. Then the temperature dips. WAYYYYY down. Last night, I had to turn on the heater. And turn on the gas fireplace. It was literally freezing. Yes, within a mere week, we have had a SIXTY degree temperature swing. (Actually factually... we've had a sixty degree temp swing between two days before.) So, one day, I'm wearing a skirt and sandals. The next day, I'm wearing a parka. Don't believe me? Bring it on. I'll show you what's what. Yeah, that's what I thought.
Anger-inducing Peeve #5: Gas. Don't even get me started.
Okay, I'm much better now that I got that out of my system. Thanks for tuning in.