Wednesday, April 26, 2006

More stuff that pisses me off...

Hey, every now and then (or more often than not), I have to live up to my blog name. Okay? Yeah, that's what I thought.


Anger-inducing Peeve #1: Waiting for FIVE MINUTES in a left-turn lane with a red turn light when there is no oncoming traffic. It's not a dangerous road- you could see any approaching vehicles from about half a mile away. There is absolutely NO purpose for that light to stay red, other than during heavy traffic times. Five minutes, people. Do you know what I could be doing with five extra minutes in my day? Yeah. That's what I thought.

Anger-inducing Peeve #2: Watching Ryan Seacrest pause before he's supposed to announce who's going home on American Idol, and knowing he's going to say "... right after this commercial break." Really. We know you need your ad time. Why don't you just cut through the crap and tell us what we want to know early on in the show, say the first 15 minutes. Then you can play all the ads you want. Sure, we'll be gone. But we won't be driving a nail through our palms each time you say, "... right after this commercial break." Listen to me, Seacrest. Nigel Lythgoe, you too. This is not suspense. It's just pissing us off. I flip the channel to watch something else until the last 4 minutes of your show now. So, what now? Yeah, that's what I thought.

(counter to anger-inducing peeve... America finally got it right! Kellie Pickler, it was nice knowing you! Not really, but I'm just saying.)

Anger-inducing Peeve #3: My bathroom scale is a big, fat, stupid head LIAR! I hate it. It sits there, all smug, on the tile of my bathroom floor... just daring me to have hope. I'm working out everyday. Two days a week, I'm with a physical therapist for an hour. Did you hear that?!?! An HOUR!!! Sure, it's not terribly intense, but it's still more movement than my crazy, broken body saw 6 months ago. I'm eating so well (even let up a little on the Chipotle addiction). People who eat around me feel ashamed for all the greasy nastiness they are consuming. I'm eating my 1200 or less calories a day of fruits, veggies, lean protein, blah, blah, blah. But I'm digressing somewhat...

Back to that arsehole scale of mine: it's evil. Just when I feel like, "Hey! I bet I've lost at least a pound or two! Scale-y loves me. I'll just ease my toes ever so slightly onto it's cute, white surface, and..." BAM! No loss. Not one stinking pound. As I stand there and watch the digital numbers move back and forth... then finally rest on the higher number (of course)... I hear the scale huffing and puffing like it's out of breath. I step off, defeated... and then it laughs at me. Oh, yes it does. No, really. It does. Don't argue with me, or I'll punch you. Yeah, that's what I thought.

Anger-inducing Peeve #4: The month of April. Wha? Yes, I said the month of April. It seems all nice and shiny... spring is here, tra la! Au contraire, mon frere... not in the midwest. It is the month of UPS and DOWNS.

April crept in and gave us this lovely, temperate weather, and we all sighed... contentedly. Then... it got hot. Like Africa hot (okay, maybe not THAT hot, but I just like saying that). Like 90 degrees F hot. Hmmm... turn on the AC in April? Okay. I'll bite. A day or two of that, then it hovered around the 70-80 degree F range. That's fine. AC keeps things nice and shuts off when not needed. No prob. Then the temperature dips. WAYYYYY down. Last night, I had to turn on the heater. And turn on the gas fireplace. It was literally freezing. Yes, within a mere week, we have had a SIXTY degree temperature swing. (Actually factually... we've had a sixty degree temp swing between two days before.) So, one day, I'm wearing a skirt and sandals. The next day, I'm wearing a parka. Don't believe me? Bring it on. I'll show you what's what. Yeah, that's what I thought.

Anger-inducing Peeve #5: Gas. Don't even get me started.


Okay, I'm much better now that I got that out of my system. Thanks for tuning in.

20 comments:

Ludicrousity said...

Th eprice of petrol is just plain evil. And I hate the way idol draws out everything. The way the hosts speak annoys me to no end...

therevhead said...

Whew - what a MAGNIFICENT rant!!! Farmboy had best shut up and stay low for a while!

Master Peebody said...

Hahaha, big, fat, stupid head liar! I haven't heard that since i was a little kid! :D

wire said...

i love the way you finished each one of those statements with "Yeah, that's what i thought." I can imagine you syng that as you chase off punk kids down an alley. Such a toughie.

wire said...

i decided that including vowels in the word 'saying' was for chumps.

Paisley said...

Maybe you should up your calories to 1500. Or google bmr calculator and that will tell you more about the range you should be in. I had the same problem. 1200. working out. being good. zero weightloss. My body thought I was depriving it so it held on tight to the weight. When I upped it a little, it made a huge difference. Worth looking in to. Dieting sucks ASS, so if you want to throw your scale out of your car onto the busy highway just know that it's my voice you hear in your head cheering.

P.S. email me what kind of whey you get. there are so many it makes me confused!

Jege (Jen) said...

I agree with Paisley, eat more. Also remember, muscle weighs more than fat. You are probably losing fat, but gaining muscle. Don't use the scale as a gauge...instead, use how your clothes fit. And beat the living shit out of that scale ala "Office Space".

Julie_Gong said...

I tried to tell people that April sucked but no one took me seriously.

And just so you know... "It is the month of UPS and DOWNS." I read that as "It is the month of U-P-S..." as in the company who employs brown dressed men and women delivering packages. Wow... I need Friday now!

nabbalicious said...

I haven't watched "American Idol" lately, but Ryan Seacrest is STILL doing that?

God, I hate that guy.

tammara said...

I'm weighing in (har-de-har!) with Paisley and Jen. Girl, eat MORE. You aren't eating enough to get your metabolism moving. According to one bmr calculator I found a while ago(I'll look for it), at 5'5" and 130 lbs, I would need 1829 calories with light activity and 2062 with moderate activity to maintain that weight.

I don't know what weight you are going for - but at 130, while lifting weights, I wore a size 4, and an occassional 2. Before lifting weights, 130 lbs meant a size 8 for me.

I'm trying to lose now, too, so I know your frustration, watching those numbers see-saw up and down. Don't forget to use a tape measure and just how your clothes fit - those things are more important than the number on the scale.

tammara said...

Okay, here's one that looks pretty good, because you can enter your activity level and find out what calories per day you should consume. It's a little low, compared to the one I found before. I've never eaten less than 1800 calories for more than a couple of days. (The actual BMR is just what you need to live - and not move at all. For me, that's nearly 1400...) Don't forget to put in the weight you WANT to be, because it gives you a number based on maintaining that weight.

http://html.ketv.com/sh/idi/health/calcs/bmrcalc.html

don't call me MA'AM said...

ludi: evil. yep, plain evil.

rev: Farm Boy is still out of town. Hence, the NEED for me to rant. *missing him*

MPB: I figured you could relate. haha

wire: I'm soooo tough! If my physical strength could only live up to the strength of my will, I would kick ass all day long. Hell, I'd be Chuck Norris-Lite. ;-)

paisley,jege, and tammara: I did bump up the calories for a while. And I GAINED weight. I usually eat 6 small meals a day... and that has always worked well. My doctor is currently baffled, too, so I don't feel as bad. It's just frustrating. Grrr.

julie: I did the exact same thing when I read through it before posting. UPS? How are shipping guys related to April? HA! Little brown men...

nabbs: yes. He is. And he needs to be stopped.

tammara (again): Guess what? That webpage is one of our local tv stations. Did you know that.. and that's why you chose it? or just coincidence?

Thanks for all the support, friends.

Jaek said...

I agree with Julie...I thought, "What is here problem with UPS? What hasen't brown done for her? And, seriously...DOWNS!? Can she really have a problem with Downs Syndrome."

I hate things too.

Things suck.

don't call me MA'AM said...

jaek: EEEK! No! I love UPS. Our UPS guys is tres, tres friendly, but in a very appropriate way.

And I hold a very special place in my heart for people with Down Syndrome. Besides family members with that syndrome, I have worked for a lot of years, on and off, teaching music to those whom I call the "sweetest angels on the planet." So, no... I would never, EVER have a problem there. :-)

wire said...

just noticed the "Qoute/Phrase i can't stop using". hahaha, what's going on there? it's not really something i can imagine comes up in conversation all that much... or does it?

don't call me MA'AM said...

Wire: go to Julie Gong's blog. I'm linking directly to the post where she has some clips from the TV show, Wonder Showzen. The third one, Visit to the Vet, is where you'll hear the clip. It's pretty darn funny... if you can ignore the fact that the kid who is uttering it will probably be messed up for life.

tammara said...

That's total coincidence, and very odd. Especially since I came up with a bunch of googled stuff, and I liked that one the best. WEIRD.

don't call me MA'AM said...

tammara: VERY weird. I saw the station letters in the URL and freaked just a little. ;-)

Ludicrousity said...

Oh you are totally the female version of chuck norris!!!

Jege (Jen) said...

DCMM: Try going to a holistic doctor. It sounds like your thyroid is keeping you from losing weight, and perhaps there are also food allergies at work.

A friend of mine's doc told her that her thyroid was normal, and couldnt figure out why she wasnt losing weight. But the Naturopath told her that thyroid function is extremely individual, and just because it falls within the standard "chart", that does not mean it's normal.

Anyway, the Naturopath put my friend on supplements, and changed her diet around slightly, and she started losing weight.