Friday, June 23, 2006

Is it Friday already? Guess it's time for the Friday Why Files...

You know, when you are on vacation, the days tend to run together. I have no idea what day it is half the time. So, I guess it's Friday. And it's time for some WHY's.

WHY #1: As predicted... why didn't I stretch more yesterday? And why did I feel the need to prove how great a batter I am? I'm 37 years old and WAYYYYY out of shape. I don't feel as bad as I thought I would, but I'm definitely a little sore. Today, I've had to do a LOT of stretches.

WHY #2: Why is today labeled the Happiest-Day-of-the-Year (yeah, I know what the research says)? Personally, my happier days of the year are:
*Opening-Day-of-Football-Season
*Those-Days-When-The-Temperature-and-Humidity-Work-Together-So-That-One-Can-Actually-Breathe-When-Stepping-Outside
*Christmas
*Any-Day-When-I-Get-To-Sleep-In

WHY #3: Why didn't the authorities just explain that they added maggots to the delinquents' food for extra protein? Durr!

WHY #4: In the whole school lunch debate going on in schools all across the country... when are people going to learn that you can't just leave the nutrition decisions to parents and students? Here's the deal: I tell my kids what they can and can't eat at school. BUT I'M NOT THERE WHEN THEY ORDER THEIR FOOD! Until this past year, I never knew what the kids were ordering. Now, I can get an email of their order history for the month. And I can now hold them accountable. Not every school has that, so many parents are rendered helpless about their child's lunch choices.

So, why are people in Boston going nuts about the Fluffernutter* sandwich? Do kids REALLY need the option of eating marshmallow goo and peanut butter every day? Have you seen the kids in this country? Do you understand the reason TLC has a show called, "Honey We're Killing the Kids?" Come ON! (interesting show, btw)

WHY #5: Why did someone say "YES" to giving Janice Dickinson her own show AND her own modeling agency?** Actually, I can answer this one: because this woman is such a trainwreck... and quite possibly certifiable... that people just have to watch her. Her show is on the Oxygen channel, and I've surfed over it a few times, only to find myself oddly intrigued. If you need some info on Janice, head over to fourfour... he's got the scoop on everything Janice, from her judge spot on America's Next Top Model to her new show. Hee-larious.

This concludes today's Friday Why Files.

*Fluffernutter... yep, that's what they call it. I'm pulling a "Jack and Karen" and giggling like a little girl right now.

**I might apply to Janice as a web site developer. Her agency page is pathetic.

8 comments:

-R- said...

Don't mess with the fluffernutter. It is a HUGE deal in New England. It's not much worse than PB&J.

I haven't seen Janice's show yet. I think she is just a little too crazy (and by that I mean certificably insane) for me.

Stinkypaw said...

#1: Stretching should be your friend, especially getting... er...hum...wiser!

#2: Totally with you on the day I get to sleep in and Christmas

#3: Just of thought of bugs in my food... urk!

#4: Once in a while, why not?! But not daily. It's pretty pathetic to see some of those families and their eating habits on "Honey We're Killing the Kids". No wonder kids (and most of the time, parents as well) are overweight - it's ridiculous. Those "predictions/pictures" are pretty scary at times.

#5: That is one scary...model that Janice. Can not believe she was a top model, when? And her website sucks, just like her face!

Ludicrousity said...

Once again, I can only take solace in removing myself from the human race.

Margus said...

man that marshmallow stuff is so awesome. I saw let the fat kids eat it, the science club always needs memebers.

don't call me MA'AM said...

-r-: I know it is. They're even introducing legislation to make it their state sandwich. My point is: don't make it available for kids to 'choose' to eat everyday of the week. I feel the same way about PB&J. Unless the jelly is sugar free and the PB is lowfat, there isn't a lot of nutritional benefit in that sandwich. PB has good protein, but too much fat.

stinkypaw: I stretched SOME before the batting, but obviously not enough. ;-) And yeah, Janice does scare me quite a bit.

ludi: We should start a 'super-humans' club. Anyone can join, assuming they haven't done something inanely stupid in the last 10 years. :-)

margus: boo... you're mean!

Alyssa said...

All this Beantown fluffer madness is due to the rain, I think. It's been raining for like... three months and all humidity is starting to make everybody's brain soft.

Also - I think the Red Sox have been spotty, which always results in super stupid behavior.

goldennib said...

Maggots and Fluff - nectar of the gods.

Ludicrousity said...

I'd be banned from the club...