Sunday, January 29, 2006

Ben Franklin, please meet The Laundry Lady...

Benjamin Franklin has been quoted many times, but the most frequently cited is this one: "In this world nothing is certain but death and taxes. "

Well, Ben... obviously, you have never been to my house. If you had, then you would know that the only certainty in this place is LAUNDRY. No matter how much I do, there's always more to wash. How can that be? Do I really have this many clothes? Because, oddly enough, even after I've done several loads of my laundry, there's still nothing to wear. And that's not even counting the Farm Boy, Westley's laundry... or even any of the kids'.*

That means... instead of coming up with some incredibly entertaining post for the day (ha ha), I'll have to settle for a quick list:

5 Amusing Things from this weekend:

1. Went to see Brokeback Mountain with my husband last night. Since I was driving, and we were running late, I told him that I would drop him off to buy the tickets while I parked. All I got was the deer-in-the-headlights look and a "No WAY am I buying tickets to that movie without you glued to my side." That just made me giggle. (and yes, I really enjoyed this movie.)

2. Warning: TMI ahead! Our smallest dog sleeps with us at night. So, obviously, in the lives of two married people, there are times when a dog is not welcome in the bed. In the past, he has been carried out of the room to "wait" outside our door. And he doesn't like it one bit. Recently, he's learned that he can just jump off the bed and wait inside the room, if we don't notice him. The funny part is now, if my husband even reaches over to kiss me goodnight, the dog jumps off the bed until he thinks we're "done."

3. Not that I'm a big celebrity follower or basher, but... what the hell happened to Fergie? I don't really care for her, and I'm absolutely disgusted by her peeing accidents, but seriously. She was somewhat cute at one time. Now, she's just scary looking. We saw her on some tv show, and she looked like the Joker from Batman. About a year ago, she looked her age. Now she looks older than I do.

4. My dad was upset that "our chili" (the 10 gallons of it that my mom and I made for about 4 hours on Friday... and for which he played absolutely no part in cooking) didn't win the chili contest on Friday. He was convinced that the voting was rigged. Really? The chili feed was a fundraiser for a church-sponsored pre-school. And, apparently, they're rigging the votes. Because that framed certificate declaring the 2006 winner must be printed on platinum or something. Good GOD, man! Please find something else to bitch about.

5. None of our four children have been with us since Friday night. A "kid-less" weekend should be a party-laden, drunken, full-fledged celebration of debauchery, right? So, what did we do? We napped yesterday, saw a 7pm movie, came home, and went to bed. Yep. That's just the kind of exciting people we are. Tonight, we'll go to a 5pm hockey game, where I MIGHT just yell at the players to kick some ass. Yep. I'm a wild one. Don't get too close to me... I might taint you with my licentious ways.

*Hubby AND kids are all capable of doing their own laundry. That's really nice... except then we argue over who gets to the washer and dryer first.


Master Peebody said...

Haha, i like no1.

Red said...

I was about to give you a resounding "I hear ya" about laundry, but then I read on that you have four children, and I realized that I have absolutely no right to complain about my one-person laundry pile. How do you do it, woman?!

Jaek said...

Do you actually take care of the clothes? Wife and I manage to get it folded and to the stairs...then it ends up on the to one side. One stair for me, one for wife, one for Son, one for Daughter. Now the clothes just end up in a basket at the bottom of the stairs. Honestly, why isn't the laundry room upstairs? Less travel for the pants.

don't call me MA'AM said...

MPB: I was laughing at him last night like a little schoolgirl!

Red: Two of our kids are only with us on the weekends, and the other two are here most of the time. BUT... everyone is in charge of their own laundry. I just act a "police officer" to make sure it all gets done. I think the kids are probably doing a better job than the adults at this point.

jaek: The hanging clothes are the easiest. We just keep a lot of hangers in the laundry room and hang them up as we take them out of the washer. As for folding clothes, those often don't make it into the drawers. :-(

Ludicrousity said...

hey, I can't clikc on the "brilliant analysis" link. I have to click on the 'links to this post' thing, then post a comment. What's up with that?

I want to see brokeback mountain.

Since I moved back home, mum does the washing. Oh yeah! I do it sometimes, and so does dad, but the majority of the time, I don't have to do my own washing. it's great! :)

Dboy said...

That's because your silly Mac is a piece of half-decomposed rat dung.

Licentious! The Joker!


Margus said...

It wasn't pee, it was excesive vaginal excessive vaginal sweat. : )

lol, like that makes any difference.

don't call me MA'AM said...

Ludi: I'll check into it. I notice it does work fine when I use my PC, but not my Mac. Thanks for letting me know.

Dboy: we love ALL platforms here. Even those composed of rat dung. hahahaha ;-)

margus: you're yucky. Oh, and I think I would rather admit to peeing myself than for THAT explanation. I'm just sayin'.

Paisley said...

the only thing I hate more than unloading the dishwasher is folding laundry.

Your dog is too funny!

I think we had the same weekend! On Saturday I said I wanted to watch a movie in bed. My husband looked at me mortified. It was 9:30. I'm so fun.

don't call me MA'AM said...

Paisley, I just have it down to a fine art. I hang up almost EVERYTHING. Even t-shirt. Except the kind I wear to bed... I'll still fold those. I don't fold socks or panties. What's the point?!? So, that leaves sweatshirts and towels. Done. ;-) Unfortunately, that means all my dressers are fairly empty and my closet is overflowing.